A Me I didn’t know

Mental health is complex …  an enigma … a road full of blooming trees, sudden potholes, detours, often absence of maps, dark, lonely, sudden ray of sunshine and birds singing,  thunder, downpours, fellow travelers, cheering crowds, jeering folks … but I am here !

I think I am here.  My doctor has to certify that 😊…. But I think I have reached.

I wake up each morning and look at myself in wonder.  I am learning to know me.  To appreciate me.  This is a me I have never known.  Not for a moment. 

I am looking forward to weening off the last medicine … and live the rest of my life to the fullest ! 

It has not been easy, and it took me 55 years.  I gave so many talks on career, work – life balance, motivation, wellness  …. And lately on living an authentic self !  I always felt like a con-person after each such talk.  I went to a cocoon each time and I loathed myself. 

Now I feel I found that person who was hiding inside of me.  Freer,  happier, energetic, brimming with life and at peace.

I understood that I am complete.  I am valid.   I do not have to prove anything to anybody but only answerable to me. 

The first step to being authentic. 

I thank my counselors

I thank my doctor

I thank my friends who held me as I  bawled or when I didnt

I thank my family who didn’t know how to help but was there

I thank my work and peers for being there as a bridge over troubled waters

I thank the innumerable people I met in my life …  each person spoke to me.  I learnt, I watched, I felt, I knew and I grew. 

Here’s to the new Me …  and I am so glad to have met you finally !